Loneliness Feeling: How to deal with it
Feeling lonely is a common human experience that can affect anyone, regardless of age or background. It is important to recognize that loneliness is not solely defined by the absence of people, but rather by the feeling of disconnection and lack of meaningful connection. Adressing loneliness requires a combination of self-reflection, reaching out, and perspective taking. Here are a few strategies to help you overcome the loneliness feeling:
1. Make Room for Your Emotions
Start by acknowledging without attachment your emotions surrounding loneliness. Observe what arise when you feel lonely and how it manifests itself in your body. Identify any patterns or triggers that contribute to your sense of isolation. Allowing your emotions and body sensations to be, without triying to fight against or escape from them, could drive you to change the relationship with loneliness, diminishing its impact on your life.
2. Cultivate Meaningful Connections
Building and nurturing meaningful connections is crucial for everyone. Instead of focusing on what you are missing or getting attached to being alone, act. Reach out to friends, family members, or even acquaintances with whom you feel a connection. Engage in activities that facilitate social interaction, such as joining clubs, volunteering, or attending community events. Connecting with others who share similar interests can help foster a sense of belonging.
3. Take a look at your thoughts
What is your mind telling you about loneliness? As verbal creatures, we tend to follow language rules in (and out of) our minds, and sometimes we become so attached to them that we act automatically based on a preconceived conception of loneliness. For instance, we associate loneliness with something bad and dangerous, and consequently we have to do something to escape from it in order to feel well or safe. Either we compare our life with social networks, or we classify loneliness as "not normal" or “weird” and in order not to be like that, we have to avoid it. What's more, being alone (physically) or single is sometimes also associated with unhappiness or thoughts of suffering in the future. “What's wrong with me that no one choose me?”; “I will end up alone forever”; “When I am an old person I will have no one with me.” And the opposite... being in a relationship, finding our other sock, as one of the condiments to achieve happiness.
4. Catch your mind chatting
Try to reflect on whether that feeling of loneliness is something you are experiencing based on your present, direct interaction with current situations in your life or whether it is something based on verbal and social rules you have bought into. Notice if you are acting to avoid that monster of loneliness or if you are acting in a way that deepens current relationships.
Loneliness is just a feeling...uncomfortable, unpleasant, a sh*t...and yes, you didn't ask for it and yet you’re experiencing it. I'm not going to lie to you, discomfort is part of life, but feeding it with thoughts increases its intensity while distracting you from what is worthwhile. And if it limits your life in the present, then it may not be worthy....
*If feelings of loneliness persist and start to significantly impact your daily life, seeking professional help from a therapist or counselor can be beneficial. A mental health professional can provide guidance, support, and effective coping strategies tailored to your specific circumstances.
